Posted in parenting

Choosing not to have children

I was recently asked what I thought when people said they didn’t want to have children. My initial thought was I feel sad for them because they have no idea what they are missing out on. Yes parenting is hard and life changing but it’s amazing. The hugs, kisses, the pride when they accomplish something on their own, their sweet laughter, being able to kiss away their tears… I could go on and on.
But then I stopped and thought about it further. The scary number of children who are abused, and neglected. The number of people who have children but don’t want them.
For me it was not a choice, not a question. It was something I had dreamed about, looked forward to for most of my life. But what about those who did not have that drive or calling. And I thought about what it would take to go against what is expected if you are in a stable long term relationship, what is considered normal. Also what it would take to recognize that you are not parenting material and that you truly would not be good for a child.
And I have to say…….thank you. Thank you for recognizing that in yourself, for standing up for who you really are because there are more than enough parents who should not be parents and sadly more unwanted children than there should be.

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